Hello :)
I've been restricting myself over the weekend... Again.
I know it needs to stop but at least it's only for the weekend, weekdays I eat pretty much according to my food plan set by my nutritionist.
I've also been excessively counting calories, it's so hard to stop because I don't even catch myself doing it until it's too late! Does anyone have any advice on this? (much appreciated!)
On the mental/moody front I've been really good, the whole 'i need to stay happy' attitude thing has really helped me... Be happy? ;)
Training is still sucking but I think it's just one of those phases you go through, I'm stronger than ever and feeling great when I'm running, I just haven't been able to hit and hold onto good times. I think I'm just being impatient :)
My first comp for the season is in about 5 weeks in Sydney which is pretty nerve-racking, last time I ran was at my worst stage of ED so I'm really nervous to see how I go now that I'm healthy again! I'm also feeling kind of worried about being in a crop top/ running Knicks again but i guess I'll just have to try and get past that.
I thought I'd make a bit of a list of why I love ED recovery since I tend to focus on why I hate it and thought i would share it with you:
1. I'm so much stronger (which will equate to faster come track season)
2. I dont feel hungry all the time
3. I don't get that dizzy/fainting feeling when my blood sugar is really low
4. Im actually supposed to eat that yummy (insert sweet food here) occasionally
5. I can eat the yummy things I cook AND know it's not doing me harm, it's actually making me healthier (I LOVE cooking!)
6. I can help other people get better too
7. I judge people on their happiness, not on their weight or how they look (because honestly, it doesn't matter!)
8.I go to bed at night looking forward the breakfast in the morning
9. I've realized how much people care about me (thanks mummy and my coach!)
10. I have a freaking 6-pack :) :) (hahahahaha)
Stay strong <3
courtney
Sunday 7 August 2011
Wednesday 3 August 2011
Training
Hey :)
I'm feeling good today!
Its always a good thing when I go to bed looking forward to my yummy cereal in the morning.
So it's like, 10pm now and I realized I haven't posted in a little bit so I thought id update on how I am.
Last week was horrible, padticularly Saturday when eating a little bit of the icing and cake mix from the cupcakes I was making for my little brother meant I skipped morning tea, lunch, afternoon tea and supper. So I had breakfast and dinner that day, and tried to train the next day. At least I can understand the importance of fueling my body properly now.
After a really bad week, I woke up feeling good on Sunday... Until I got to training where my coach was in a bad mood and told me I wasn't trying hard enough in my repeats. Good mood ruined, theres nothing I hate more than being told I'm not giving it my all. (my coach is NOT a horrible person! He's like a grandfather to me. He was also the first person to recognize my ED even though I was in denial myself)
I went to see soul surfer with my best friend and decided, after realizing that im lucky to even have a body that works, that I was going to do my absolute best to be happy instead of miserable about food and look after it.
So ive been fairly good the last 3 days, ocassionaly restricting myself a bit, but im staying positive about everything. Training has been... Difficult. Im finding on my repeats that the first few times are great then BAM! Sudden drop off. I guess it happens to everyone occasionally, I have a rest day (strength work in my garage) tomorrow so hopefully Fridays session will be better.
Also, if anyone ever wants to talk, I'd be happy to listen and offer advice where I can :)
Stay strong <3
Courtney
I'm feeling good today!
Its always a good thing when I go to bed looking forward to my yummy cereal in the morning.
So it's like, 10pm now and I realized I haven't posted in a little bit so I thought id update on how I am.
Last week was horrible, padticularly Saturday when eating a little bit of the icing and cake mix from the cupcakes I was making for my little brother meant I skipped morning tea, lunch, afternoon tea and supper. So I had breakfast and dinner that day, and tried to train the next day. At least I can understand the importance of fueling my body properly now.
After a really bad week, I woke up feeling good on Sunday... Until I got to training where my coach was in a bad mood and told me I wasn't trying hard enough in my repeats. Good mood ruined, theres nothing I hate more than being told I'm not giving it my all. (my coach is NOT a horrible person! He's like a grandfather to me. He was also the first person to recognize my ED even though I was in denial myself)
I went to see soul surfer with my best friend and decided, after realizing that im lucky to even have a body that works, that I was going to do my absolute best to be happy instead of miserable about food and look after it.
So ive been fairly good the last 3 days, ocassionaly restricting myself a bit, but im staying positive about everything. Training has been... Difficult. Im finding on my repeats that the first few times are great then BAM! Sudden drop off. I guess it happens to everyone occasionally, I have a rest day (strength work in my garage) tomorrow so hopefully Fridays session will be better.
Also, if anyone ever wants to talk, I'd be happy to listen and offer advice where I can :)
Stay strong <3
Courtney
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