I went to my nutritionist on Saturday and she was super pleased with me!
She said she's really happy with the way I'm managing and sticking to my food plan (well, most of the time).
It was also the first time I had seen her since I had fully recognized (and my mum!) that I had an ED, which made me pretty nervous about opening up but thankfully she's really easy to talk to and really supportive. She reinforced the fact that I AM doing the right thing by getting better and taught me how to keep my 'good brain' (the one that wants and knows I need to get better) in control instead of my 'bad brain'(EDNOS). I think the other reason I felt so nervous was that I haven't weighed myself in like 3 weeks and was scared of being weighed and seeing a huge number (I've gained so much muscle and I'm not dehydrated anymore so obviously it would go up, not sure I could cope with that) but she, now that I think of it, would have realized that and actually told me that she didn't care how much I weighed, unless it was used for hydration purposes.
ALSO, the last 2ish days since then have been good, although last week on school camp I had a major breakdown one night (don't worry, I didnt relapse again) but that's another story. Oh actually, have to add that the next day I got a necklace engraved at the markets with 'stay strong', awesome right? I was starting to go a bit downhill today until the school consellor arannged all the year 9 and 10 girls to talk with a comedian about body image (which was completely hilarious by the way). God is good, right? So that was majorly helpful in preventing... Anything. I had a good cry when I got home about it, obviously had to hold it in until I got home from school. I felt really pained that I do have an ED and body image issues, but at the same time so grateful that there are people like that who dedicate their lives to traveling to schools to promote such a powerful message.
I'm going to bed feeling okay tonight, not 'great' but not on the verge of a huge relapse either, tomorrow is another day and I'm sure I'll be in a brand new state of mind in the morning and I'll deal with that whether it be good or bad.
Stay strong <3